mary guterson

i’m on page 161 of my friend maria semple’s new book “Where’d You Go, Bernadette,” and i’m here to say you really should put it on your list to buy when it comes out which is August 14th. Don’t worry, i will remind you. Maria is SO FUNNY and so smart, it just about kills me.

and another winner is Edward St. Aubyn’s “Patrick Melrose Novels.” If you don’t like this guy’s writing, then there is something wrong with you. I’m not kidding. You can use it as a test of sorts to find out if you need therapy, or a new therapist, of just some really good drugs. I mean, besides the ones you are already taking. (If you do not take drugs already, WHO ARE YOU?)

Also, can i say that north hollywood/burbank starts off looking like the ugliest place you ever saw in your life, and then you live here and, little by little, you start to notice the best, most wonderful things and places? Like today, a friend pointed out to me this cute little shop that says “Gift Shop and Caskets” on the awning. That made me so happy.

have a good afternoon, everybody. Or life, if you never come back to this stupid blog again. Which, if you are smart (another test!), you won’t.

yours, mary

i’ve been absent for quite awhile. Apologies. man, i do not know how to even BEGIN to catch you up. So i’m not going to try.

but i will say that life is good here in the armpit of los angeles. you can’t beat the weather. After 19 years in the rainy northwest, it really is a trip to wake up each morning to blue skies. Guess what? It makes you less depressed! For those keeping track, i still have the cute boyfriend and the even cuter dog. And i’m working and i have friends and a therapist. I guess i really live here.

one thing makes me very sad, though. Recently, my most loyal reader and one of my favorite people on the planet died. Her name is karen perry, and i can’t tell you how painful it is to know that i will write this post and she won’t send me a message or a comment in response. I don’t want to think about it. She died of cancer last month and i can’t quite believe it yet. She was one of those people who always propped me up when i needed it. She’d pop up out of nowhere right when i needed her. And she always always always said the right thing. Plus, she had the best smile. I mean, a really happy smile. I hate that she’s not here any more.

okay, that did me in. i meant to write an upbeat post, but it’s not gonna happen. next time.

hope you all are well. oh yeah, i am writing again. and that’s good.

yours, mary

i’m very pleased to report that i am NOT having my annual new year’s eve party this year. So please do not show up at my house with your seven-layer dip.

Also, i will not be making any resolutions, because it’s already resolved that i will say dumb things and do dumb things and spend a lot of time obsessing and apologizing. THAT’S ENOUGH PRESSURE.

and i really, really, really hope that Dick Clark makes it safely through this evening without screwing up the count down. If Dick and i can make it safely to midnight, then anything is possible. That’s as profound as it gets around here.

also, here’s the aforementioned key to life: think happy thoughts. GOOD LUCK WITH THAT.

all the best, mary

but thank you for looking.

yours, mary

okay, i don’t have a new book out, i’ve done nothing of interest lately, i’ve been fairly absent from any sort of literary scene, so……who are you people who are looking at my page? I mean, it’s not like there are millions of you. But there ARE dozens. I just looked at my site stats and there you all are. Thanks! You’re so kind to come visit and here i’ve been just terrible at giving you anything worth looking at. My apologies. Will try to be better.

merry christmas and happy chanukah and happy new year, etc etc.

yours, mary

Hey ya’ll. I’m writing you from my bed where i am about to crash. Just totally exhausted. For some stupid reason i suddenly awaken at 3 in the morning and then i have to do about twenty things before i can fall asleep again. Change pillows. Open a window. Pull off covers. Pull them back up. Get some water. Pee. Close the window. Snuggle up to Kenji. Shove him away. Blow nose. Put on eye cover thingy-ma-bobber. Go crazy with that stupid thing over my eyes. Move dog to Kenji’s side of the bed. Get more water………you get the point.

I just got back from a literary fundraising event that was sort of like going to a wedding. It was for Red Hen Press and there were a lot of people at the cocktail party last night and then even more people at the sit down luncheon today.  TC Boyle gave a reading and the poet Natasha Trethewey. And Ron Carlson read a story. Afterward, i practically threw myself at him and told him he’s my literary crush and then i pressed a copy of one of my books onto him. Poor guy. Fortunately, Kenji saved the day by stepping and making regular conversation with him for a moment, and then we left. If you don’t know Red Hen press, you should look it up. A small non-profit publisher of poetry and fiction. Great covers on all of their books, too.

My son just bought me a ticket to come visit him in Washington DC in JANUARY. If anyone has a warm coat, can i borrow it?

I think there was more to tell you but i’m about to conk out, so thank your lucky stars i’m too tired to write more drivel.

it’s called Ed King, and i’m reading an advance copy of it right now. And oh man, it’s really, really good. Comes out in October. I’m really happy for Dave. Hope he sells a million copies.

yours, mary

did i spell your name right?

A los angeles fact for you:

In los angeles, everybody is either somebody, or they know somebody, or they’re related to somebody,  or they saw somebody throwing up in the trader joe’s parking lot (I’m talking to you Mischa Barton).

best, mary

Whenever i’m not working on my novel (which, let’s face it, is the vast majority of the time), i write copy for movie trailers. It’s maybe the most fun thing I’ve done since that summer when i followed the Cray Band up and down the west coast with Mr. Eric Hoffman. (If you know Mr. Hoffman, and if you know me, you KNOW how much fun that was.)

So right now i am writing copy for this new movie that i was only able to watch about half of, because it was so violent. I had to hold my fingers over my eyes and listen to all of the screaming and grunting and say to my boyfriend, “okay, what’s happening now?” And he’d say, oh, god, you don’t want to know. Suffice it to say, my copy uses the word “brutality” a lot. Fun!

I’m also teaching. I’ve got two fiction writing sessions coming up in September, so if you, reading this, live in Los Angeles, sign on up! writingworkshopsla.com

Back to not working on my novel.

yours, mary

ps that’s a photo of my friend ben loory’s novel. look him up NOW.

so yesterday i went kind of nuts and made friend requests on facebook to a whole bunch of authors who don’t know me from adam, and one by one they have been kindly friending me back. Crazy to find your favorite authors on facebook and friend them. I got the sweetest note from Stephen McCauley after i wrote to tell him how inspiring he’d been to me, and he ended the note by saying he was going to check out my profile but that he doesn’t spend a lot of time on FB. And i thought that was such a great way to make it clear what all of us already know–that FB is ridiculous. But still it was fun to hear from him and it’s fun to see Joyce Maynard and Russell Banks and all of the others clicking to accept my friend request. But how humiliating, really.

enough of that. I’m trying to stay away from FB anyway, but Kenji just posted a few hundred more photos of me and now my little ego can’t help but take a peek to see what people think of my new hair cut. That boy is incorrigible, although i wish you all a boyfriend just like him because what is better than a boyfriend who can’t stop taking photographs of you and thinks they are all GOOD photographs, even the terrible ones? And believe me, a lot of them are really terrible.

So go out now and buy Ben Loory’s book Stories for Nighttime and Some for the Day.

I move into my new house in one month, so it’s good bye to west hollywood and hello to north hollywood, which sounds so minor–changing west to north–but is really like saying goodbye paradise and hello wasteland, you pit of hell. But it’s my very own pit of hell and i plan on loving it there. I’m an urban pioneer!

that’s it.

yours, mary